Tuesday, March 30, 2010

How Great Thou Art

God continually amazes. He blesses me when I deserve no blessing, He blesses me, when I need it the most. When I came home from vacation Chris had caught the stomach flue, shortly after AmberDee had it. I was popping Vitamins like crazy trying to keep away from it! Both Friday and SAturday night I felt a little off, but did not get sick. I"m so thankful for that because Friday, Saturday, and Sunday proved to added up to a wonderful weekend all which helped me to prepare my mindset for the next few days. Monday night I woke up with the stomach flu. So I took it as positively as possible and used the time to get some applications filled out and was able to catch my brother online. I went to sleep dreaming of being able to eat food the next day and feeling better.
The next day, even though I felt like I hadn't slept at all, I was wide awake at 6:30, and I felt miserable, but excited. For some reason I felt like God was right there waiting to hear from me. I can't explain I just felt it, so I propped up my pillow and talked. I was filled with comfort from sharing, and excitement as I thought on the future and all the possibilities God could have in store. I was reminded of old passions and ideas and given new ideas, and I just felt so revitalized even through the nausea. I opened up my daily devotion book and read for the day(thinking it was the 29th) about how God is in control and we need to take one day at a time. THat there is a time for everything, and we need to see what God has in store for us for that day and not worry about the agendas of the future. I was comforted by that throughout the say as I focused on what I was capable of doing, and not the much needed tasks that needed to be done that I had no physical ability to do at the moment. THat first half of the day I assumed I would soon be well, ate a little whole foods, and did a little work on my computer, and enjoyed the sun. I even told the secretary of the school when she called to see if I needed another sub that I was feeling much better and should not need one.
Then I got worse. I threw up everything, lost all energy, and felt a fever coming back on a chills come all over. I called and asked for a sub for the next day. I felt like a dam of doubts were trying to overwhelm me. I was pushing to keep away the thoughts of how little my next paycheck would be with the missed spring break weeks and these new missed days. I was pushing back worries about getting any kind of supper ready, the possibility of getting Grandma sick, when I would be able to get back to work, and even if this would be the kind of work I would have to have next year too. On the couch I lay half in and half out, hungry and dying of thirst. I stumbled into the kitchen to get my water bottle I left there. I glanced at the clock, I don't really remember caring what time it was, but I noticed it said it was the 30th. It dawned on me that all day I had thought it was the 29th, and my thoughts went back to this mornings devotion. So I went to my room and opened it up to read the days.
There it opened with capital letters, "I AM TAKING CARE OF YOU." And continued with, "Trust Me at all times. Trust Me in all circumstances." And continued on trusting when we are weary, how before our day has even begun, it is laid out. THat He is there taking care of us, and we must turn our eyes to Him, and Trust.
What a perfect passage for the perfect time. So once again I am overwhelmed. I am overwhelmed by His care for me, His love for me, and how He uses so many things to speak to us. If we would only look for them. So through it all, I will continue to trust in Him, and know He cares.


Meredith Marie said...

I just want you to know that your relationship with God is so encouraging! :) Its obvious how real and honest it is and it makes me want to better my relationship with Him :) So thanks for sharing :)

JK Williams said...

I am so happy to hear you are doing well spiritually though this tough time physically! You are a great encouragement! Love you and wish I was there to help.